How Cold Is It?

Tonight the temperatures are going to drop down into the single digits.  After dinner I turned up the thermostat and put on an extra layer to keep warm.  The cats are huddled together on the couch.

It's so cold that. . .

• Starbucks is serving coffee on a stick
• Lawyers have their hands in their own pockets.
• My car won’t run, and my nose won’t stop.
• Police tell a robber to freeze, and he does.
• We had to chisel the dog off a lamp-post
• Levi Strauss started manufacturing electric jeans
• The squirrels in the park are throwing themselves at an electric fence.
• The optician was giving away free ice scrapers with every new pair of eyeglasses.
• Hitchhikers are holding up signs with pictures of thumbs.
• The Amish are buying electric blankets.