The Talking Cuckoo Clock

Yet another funny from a friend:

A woman got invited out for a night with the girls. She promised her husband that she would be home by midnight. Well, the hours passed and the wine went down way too easy. Around 3:00 AM she finally headed for home.

Just as the woman got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started and cuckooed three times. Quickly realizing her husband would probably wake up, she cuckooed another nine times before coming to bed. Everything seemed fine. The next morning, when the husband asked what time she got in, she said, "Midnight."

The husband simply shrugged and said, "We need a new cuckoo clock."

"Why?" the woman asked.

"Well, last night the clock cuckooed three times, then said, 'Oh shit'. It cuckooed four more times, farted, cuckooed another three times, cleared its throat, cuckooed twice more, giggled, and then tripped over the coffee table."