An Early Present For You

I forgot to ask what you wanted for Christmas, but everyone can use some humor at this time of the year.

• What do you say when you give someone a set of spices for Christmas? Season’s greetings.

• What did Santa and Mrs. Clause name their daughter? Mary Christmas.

• Why was the candy cane so expensive? It was in mint condition.

• Did you hear about the dog who wrote his own Christmas song? It’s called Dachshund Through the Snow.

• What kind of music do elves love the most? Wrap.

• What do you call Santa when he accidentally falls in a fireplace? Krisp Kringle.

• What kind of linens to gingerbread men put on their beds? Cookie sheets.

• What nationality is Santa Claus? North Polish.

• What’s the difference between a normal alphabet and the North Pole alphabet? The North Pole has no L

• What’s the most popular breakfast cereal at the North Pole? Snowflakes.

• What did the wise men say after they offered up their gifts of gold and frankincense? Wait, there’s myrrh.

• Do Christmas lights work over the holidays? Off and on.

Five years ago today: Grow, Baby, Grow